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AtricleZine - Nancy Pelosi and Osama Bin Laden - Is There A Connection?
The land of Cape of Good Hope, wonderful flora and fauna, multiple languages and mother of eminent leader like Nelson Mandela, South Africa awaits no introduction. There are more than a few reasons that make this country an apple of everyone’s eye.The Matchless Wildlife AdventureOne of its distinguished features is the Kruger National Park that invites visitors from all round the world. The ferocious as well as the gentle wildlife is at parade in this park. The park that is the home for the Big Five Animals i.e. lions, elephants, leopards, black rhinos and Cape buffalo, is supposed to be the largest wildlife park in the world today. Young as well as adult come to South Africa with a dream to encounter exclusive 142 species of animals and 507 types of birds found here. This park is the most breathtaking adventure trip for all its visitors. The wonderful fantasy of Jungle Book comes to life for the children wh
Nancy: Is this what you called about?
Osama: I called to invite you to be my guest.
Nancy: Your guest?
Osama: Yes, I'd like to give you a ticker ta
We've all heard the recommendation from the insurance industry that one of the best ways of saving money on car insurance is to watch your Credit Score. This is due to the fact that approximately 90% of all insurance companies use "Risk Scores" to determine who they will issue a policy to, with over 50% of these companies using these scores to determine premiums. The insurance industry contends a direct correlation exists between financial responsibility and insurance claims. A "Risk Score" is developed by inserting your credit score and credit history into any one of a number of secret scoring models. (No one knows for sure how many of these models exist. Hundreds of companies use the ones provided by Fair Isaac or Choicepoint, but since there are no set standards, many insurance companies have developed their own.)Regardless of how they're derived, the scores are supposed to predict who is more likely to file a cl
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi is in her office, behind her desk. The phone rings.
Nancy (picking up the phone): Hello.
Male on other end (Middle Eastern accent): Hello, is this Nancy Pelosi?
Nancy: Yes it is.
Male: Can you hold please for one second, my boss would like to speak with you.
Nancy: Who is this?
Another male on the other end (also Middle Eastern accent): Hello, Nancy.
Nancy: Who is this?
Male: I'm a great admirer of yours. (a few seconds of dead silence) This is Osama.
Nancy: Osama?
Male: Yes, Osama bin Laden.
Nancy: The terrorist?
Male: Oh, please, you're too kind. I like to think of myself as an absentee Bush-basher.
Nancy: Can I help you?
Osama: You already are.
Nancy: How's that?
Osama: What I couldn't do by crashing planes into buildings, you do with your tongue.
Nancy: Listen here Mr. bin Laden ...
Osama: Oh, please, call me Osama.
Nancy: Whatever ... look, I have nothing to do with your devious plots.
Osama: Nancy, Nancy, we have so much in common ... you hate George Bush, I hate George Bush. You want the troops out of Iraq, I want the troops out of Iraq. You go to Syria to get help from Assad, I go to Syria to get help from Assad. Of course, there's a little difference -- I know he's on my side, you THINK he's on your side. But that's a minor difference. The point is, we like the same people, we hate the same people ... why, it's almost like I have a twin sister. Say, were you born in the Afghan mountains on ...
Nancy: ... no, I was not born in the Afghan mountains ...
Osama: ... it's strange that you should say you have nothing to do with my plots. I keep telling my men this, but they don't believe me. They think you're on my payroll. And I keep telling them, no, no, her work is all pro bono (whispers) that's "free" in legal ...
Nancy: ... yes, I know what that means. Osama, I love my country.
Osama: Ah, what's love got to do with it? Listen, Tina ... I mean, Nancy, you're a better person than I am. I knock down a few buildings, and Americans hate Muslims. You open your mouth, and Americans hate Americans. I could never do the kind of damage you do. If you became president, I could cut my staff in half -- I could let go 300 suicide nuclear-bomber trainees and 21,000 virgins.
Nancy: Is this what you called about?
Osama: I called to invite you to be my guest.
Nancy: Your guest?
Osama: Yes, I'd like to give you a ticker tap
What does it mean to be a mystery shopper? It is quite simple - a person is paid to visit local stores and evaluate the kind of service they get. They enter the store and acts like an ordinary customer, just to keep the identity of mystery shopper a secret. A mystery shopper evaluates different aspects of the service while they are in the store.Mystery shoppers provide businesses with more information through the use of questionnaires and detailed narratives. These questionnaires provide businesses with an unbiased opinion of how they are perceived by the customer. Mystery shoppers relieve the owner of this added responsibility. Business owners who are presently using these kind of services are now getting a more realistic picture of how their customers perceive their company.The mystery shopper company work with their clients to establish mechanisms to measure and improve the levels of service. The informati
Nancy: Who is this?
Male: I'm a great admirer of yours. (a few seconds of dead silence) This is Osama.
Nancy: Osama?
Male: Yes, Osama bin Laden.
Nancy: The terrorist?
Male: Oh, please, you're too kind. I like to think of myself as an absentee Bush-basher.
Nancy: Can I help you?
Osama: You already are.
Nancy: How's that?
Osama: What I couldn't do by crashing planes into buildings, you do with your tongue.
Nancy: Listen here Mr. bin Laden ...
Osama: Oh, please, call me Osama.
Nancy: Whatever ... look, I have nothing to do with your devious plots.
Osama: Nancy, Nancy, we have so much in common ... you hate George Bush, I hate George Bush. You want the troops out of Iraq, I want the troops out of Iraq. You go to Syria to get help from Assad, I go to Syria to get help from Assad. Of course, there's a little difference -- I know he's on my side, you THINK he's on your side. But that's a minor difference. The point is, we like the same people, we hate the same people ... why, it's almost like I have a twin sister. Say, were you born in the Afghan mountains on ...
Nancy: ... no, I was not born in the Afghan mountains ...
Osama: ... it's strange that you should say you have nothing to do with my plots. I keep telling my men this, but they don't believe me. They think you're on my payroll. And I keep telling them, no, no, her work is all pro bono (whispers) that's "free" in legal ...
Nancy: ... yes, I know what that means. Osama, I love my country.
Osama: Ah, what's love got to do with it? Listen, Tina ... I mean, Nancy, you're a better person than I am. I knock down a few buildings, and Americans hate Muslims. You open your mouth, and Americans hate Americans. I could never do the kind of damage you do. If you became president, I could cut my staff in half -- I could let go 300 suicide nuclear-bomber trainees and 21,000 virgins.
Nancy: Is this what you called about?
Osama: I called to invite you to be my guest.
Nancy: Your guest?
Osama: Yes, I'd like to give you a ticker ta
Halloween history is all about dressing up in scary costumes and eating sweets. There is no reason to make your party any different. When Halloween party planning it’s important that you decide on a theme, let your imagination go wild. Some good Halloween party ideas include horror films, myths and many more. Be sure to include some frightening Halloween party supplies. Green jelly with jelly insects always goes down a treat and not just with the kids.The important thing when thinking about Halloween recipes is to consider whether you can dress your Halloween recipes up so they are suitably frightening for a Halloween party. Don’t forget to include alcohol for the adults and pop for the children, Halloween party games can be a very thirsty affair. Halloween party favors can be as outrageous or traditional as you like. Most kids will be more than happy with a bag full of treats, or you could use a party game to decor
Osama: Oh, please, call me Osama.
Nancy: Whatever ... look, I have nothing to do with your devious plots.
Osama: Nancy, Nancy, we have so much in common ... you hate George Bush, I hate George Bush. You want the troops out of Iraq, I want the troops out of Iraq. You go to Syria to get help from Assad, I go to Syria to get help from Assad. Of course, there's a little difference -- I know he's on my side, you THINK he's on your side. But that's a minor difference. The point is, we like the same people, we hate the same people ... why, it's almost like I have a twin sister. Say, were you born in the Afghan mountains on ...
Nancy: ... no, I was not born in the Afghan mountains ...
Osama: ... it's strange that you should say you have nothing to do with my plots. I keep telling my men this, but they don't believe me. They think you're on my payroll. And I keep telling them, no, no, her work is all pro bono (whispers) that's "free" in legal ...
Nancy: ... yes, I know what that means. Osama, I love my country.
Osama: Ah, what's love got to do with it? Listen, Tina ... I mean, Nancy, you're a better person than I am. I knock down a few buildings, and Americans hate Muslims. You open your mouth, and Americans hate Americans. I could never do the kind of damage you do. If you became president, I could cut my staff in half -- I could let go 300 suicide nuclear-bomber trainees and 21,000 virgins.
Nancy: Is this what you called about?
Osama: I called to invite you to be my guest.
Nancy: Your guest?
Osama: Yes, I'd like to give you a ticker ta
Ever wonder why every movie star has a picture perfect smile? Models smoke and drink coffee all day long but when they smile, it lights up the room. So how do they do it? It’s simple – they have their teeth whitened regularly. For a movie star, $500 or more may be nothing, but for you and me, it’s ridiculous to spend a fortune on achieving whiter teeth when home teeth whitening strips can do the job just as well. Inexpensive and effective, teeth whitening strips have been on the market for six years now and are widely used.Teeth whitening strips are filmy, transparent strips made to fit upper and lower surfaces of the teeth. The inside of the strip is coated with a peroxide-based bleaching agent that adheres to your teeth and works by maintaining contact for 30 minutes. Generally, strips are designed to be used twice a day for two to four weeks. Some strips come in a higher concentration of peroxide and are meant fo
Nancy: ... no, I was not born in the Afghan mountains ...
Osama: ... it's strange that you should say you have nothing to do with my plots. I keep telling my men this, but they don't believe me. They think you're on my payroll. And I keep telling them, no, no, her work is all pro bono (whispers) that's "free" in legal ...
Nancy: ... yes, I know what that means. Osama, I love my country.
Osama: Ah, what's love got to do with it? Listen, Tina ... I mean, Nancy, you're a better person than I am. I knock down a few buildings, and Americans hate Muslims. You open your mouth, and Americans hate Americans. I could never do the kind of damage you do. If you became president, I could cut my staff in half -- I could let go 300 suicide nuclear-bomber trainees and 21,000 virgins.
Nancy: Is this what you called about?
Osama: I called to invite you to be my guest.
Nancy: Your guest?
Osama: Yes, I'd like to give you a ticker ta
The life of a mattress generally ranges between 8 to 10 years. This is however an approximation. The life of a mattress depends on its quality, how many people use it and how often it is used. A well cared for mattress can last a decade, on the other hand a mattress in a college dormitory may need to be replaced every few years.Considering that a mattress can cost anywhere from $700 to about $4000 it is wise to take good care of it to ensure longevity.Rotating the mattress increases its durability and comfort. A mattress can take the shape of a body when you sit or lie on it. Rotating it gives it a complete “new mattress feel”. But make sure you do not do this very often. This should be done once in every 4-6 months.Use mattress pads and wash them regularly; they keep the mattress dry and clean. If infants or small children are using the mattress do use mattress padding. They help in prolonging the li
Nancy: Is this what you called about?
Osama: I called to invite you to be my guest.
Nancy: Your guest?
Osama: Yes, I'd like to give you a ticker tape parade.
Nancy (thinks for a second): I don't know ...
Osama: ... Nancy, Nancy, in my part of the world you're a hero. You want to disappoint so many fans?
Nancy: Do I get my own 747?
Osama: We don't fly 747s in the mountains. But I can guarantee you a late-model, fully-loaded donkey. It gets 75 miles per bucket-full of feed, it has a saddle with a 5-speed massager, chrome-plated hooves, a rear wiper, and a surgically implanted GPS.
Nancy: Why, that's very generous of you. (thinks for a second) Say, why don't you come to Washington, instead? Run for office. Hating America has become so American, I can guarantee you'll get 90% of the liberal votes on a bucket-full of what your donkey drops on a good afternoon.
Osama: Wouldn't I need a bull for that?
Nancy: No, we don't feed 'em bull anymore. The rules have relaxed. Any close facsimile will do.
Osama: You sound pretty sure about this.
Nancy: I'm here, am I not? Have you heard me put forth one plan to help this country's economy or terrorist problem? Nothing -- zip. And they love me.
Osama: But you're a grandmother.
Nancy: That's true. But what other qualifications do I have for being House Speaker?
Osama: I hear you. But how would I get Americans to vote for me?
Nancy: Are you kidding? With your talents you could convince Americans that if they vote for you they go to heaven and get 70 hotdogs and two tickets to the World Series.
Osama: I like that idea. (thinks for a second) How come hotdogs don't work for my people?
Nancy: For suicide, you have to promise them a little more than hotdogs. Here, all you'd be asking them to do is hand over the country to you. They do that every four years for a good song-n-dance.
Osama: Nancy, you are brilliant.
Nancy: Now, isn't this a lot better than blowing up buildings?
Osama: Yes, a lot better, and a lot safer.
Nancy: Safer? Don't tell me (with a smirk) you're afraid of ...
Osama: ... of being killed? Of course.
Nancy: What about those seventy virgins?
Osama: Come on, you think I believe that nonsense? Nancy, you and I are in the same business. You don't
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